For more than 25 years, Mariska Hargitay has been in our living rooms as Detective Olivia Benson, the kindhearted Law & Order: SVU. But long before she became one of television’s most beloved characters, Hargitay knew exactly what she wanted to do: help people feel less alone.
Over the years, she has done this both on and off screen. Through her Happy Heart Fund and advocacy work to help address the backlog of the National Rape Collection, she turned the audience’s trust in Benson into real action. And lately, she’s been telling more of her story.
In My mother Janethe documentary she directed and produced about her mother, Jane Mansfield, Hargitay takes a closer look at her family’s complicated story and revisits her parents’ lives and legacy. This summer, she’ll bring that same vulnerability to Broadway Everything is greata one-woman show about resilience, connection and finding joy in difficult times.
Another project that is close to his heart Investigation of myelomaThe Bristol Myers Squibb campaign was inspired by Mickey Hargitay’s father’s experience with multiple myeloma, the second most common blood cancer. Through the campaign, Hargitay hopes to raise awareness about the disease and research that will help shape its future.
We recently caught up with Hargitay to talk about grief, healing, Broadway, Olivia Benson, and the self-care experience that changed everything.
You played Olivia Benson for over two decades. What was it like watching the audience develop such a deep relationship with him?
It was unusual. I can’t believe it, and at the same time, because I’ve been doing this for so long, it’s completely natural. All I wanted to do since I was little was to inspire people. One of my mottos in life is that our vulnerability makes us stronger.
I’ve been in this very privileged position of having people share their stories with me. It’s beautiful to remove the shame, isolation, and stigma that can come with it: to put the blame on the perpetrator and remind people that it wasn’t their fault, someone did something to them that should never have been done. This is an incredible sisterhood and I can be a part of it.
Your documentary, "my mother jane" meant that you both knew your parents better after they were gone. How was that?
When I became curious about them, I realized why they did what they did and how much love they made in their decisions. I realized that I was loved, all these things I had never felt before. When we come from a place of fear, everything closes quickly. But when we come from a place of openness and give ourselves and others space and stay curious, there is so much healing potential. I came out the other side with prayers and a new nervous system. It gave me a lot of interior space. I feel like a different person now because I don’t wear it anymore.
You’re making your Broadway debut "Everything great" a one-woman show. What’s it like being on stage and playing in front of the camera every night?
This show is about a young girl trying to deal with her mother’s suicide attempts. Like my film, it deals with difficult things. But we all carry something. This is what connects us.
This is one of the most valuable things in a community, basically in a dialogue with a group of people. It’s a back-and-forth conversation, and it’s pretty cool. It’s scary too, I’m not going to lie. I’ve never done anything like this, and not only is it my first show, but it’s a one-woman show on Broadway.
On TV, you’re with your crew and cast, and it’s safe. It’s a very fundamental thing, almost (about) the role of the storyteller in a group of people. It’s how we feel most connected, how we learn and how we grow. And it’s different every night. There is an intimacy in it that is profound.
There’s something poetic about TV’s most reliable detective now investigating the disease that took your father. What made you decide to make your lens something personal and why now?
I am not afraid of anything personal. My father was my hero. He was my North Star and our family has been through a lot with his diagnosis. The way he walked was incredibly heroic to me: kind and loving. He was an example of how to go through life and frankly, how to live. He taught us many things. So when they called and asked me to be a partner, I don’t know if there’s anything else I want to talk about more because it’s so important to me. It was an honor and a thrill.
What is so encouraging is the new research. They didn’t have that 20 years ago. Multiple myeloma is the second most common blood cancer – about 36,000 people will be diagnosed this year. Because it affects so many people, I want them to know that there is hope.
What would you most like people to take away if they or a loved one is diagnosed with this?
Often people who receive such a diagnosis retreat. They go in fear. But strength comes from community. This is because our loved ones gather around us and do not go away. I (also) want people to know What conversations to have with your doctor.
What is great is that the picture of this disease has changed a lot. It’s an exciting time and there’s a lot of hope out there.
Do you have a secret to balancing wellness and self-care?
One of the things that changed everything for me: I used to give power to everything I had to do. I still do, but now in a very different way. I take small breaks and most importantly, I focus on my body. If I feel myself becoming active or upset, I stop and listen. I say, “Okay, I’m here. I hear you. I see you.’
I acknowledge my feelings as if they were small children who needed attention. If I’m upset, I say to myself: "I will not leave you. I don’t want to neglect you. I will stop, take notice and say we have this. It was a game changer. Very deep, indeed.
This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.
