Not everyone in the country can see the service that the nearly 2 million members of the United States Armed Forces provide every day, but when they wear the nation’s uniform, you know they are doing their part for the greater good of the country.
Many of these service members also have families, and they rely on their partners to handle important household chores so their loved ones can handle the business that comes with service. The selfless service these men and women provide is seen even less than those in uniform, but it is a form of support that cannot be emphasized enough.
Sheila Casey is a retired woman four-star general and 36th Army Chief of Staff George Casey Jr. He has also devoted himself to other passions, such as his career in government and ways to serve others. The pillars she relies on to do everything she does are fitness and being the best person she can be, and in her eyes, the reason is obvious.
“If you didn’t take care of yourself, then you wouldn’t be able to take care of your family and other important things.”
LIFE OF A MILITARY WIFE AND MOTHER
Casey was active throughout her life, but women’s sports were not as prominent as they are today. He discovered swimming and competed in the sport for 12 years. After getting married, one would think her new sport would be competitive moving because of the life she walks alongside a soldier.
“I’ve moved 25 times in 41 years.”
Their migration covered the whole world, and while her husband did everything he could, most of the work fell on her; work like coordinating the movement itself, building a house and getting to know a new community after getting used to the ways and places they have left.
Besides handling all the chores that come with being on the move so often, she was also a mother to two boys. Even with her experience as a military wife, she learns even more after her son fights for freedom.
“I thought about what it would be like to send a child into a war zone. I quickly realized that when it happened, I didn’t know until I went through it myself.”
Putting family before self is common in most households, whether military or civilian. There are some husbands who play a supporting role, but a 2017 study by the Ministry of Defense confirmed that 92 percent of spouses are women, and the concept of caring for others is, sometimes, just a natural instinct.
Casey advised that as great as it is, ignoring your needs won’t help the family in the end. She said: “I think women who are typically carers tend to think, ‘I’ll take care of myself later,’ but in the long run it doesn’t help.”
WHY HE CREATED HIS LIFE AND PROFESSION
Casey admitted that her role in the military family has come with some advantages, including skills she can apply in her career and life. She realized that making her own way was a necessity and noted that her husband agreed.
“I decided at the beginning of my marriage that I needed something for myself. “And my husband was very supportive of that, and I couldn’t take my happiness away from my wife.”
His resume is very impressive and includes 20 years as Chief Operating Officer of The Hill as well as Special Assistant to President Biden and Director of Reconciliation, following First Lady Biden’s initiative to support military and veteran families, caregivers and survivors. He has also been honored by the military as a civilian, including twice being awarded the Medal for Public Service in Defense.
Today, Casey is a senior consulting partner American Corporate Partners (ACP)a non-profit organization that offers one-on-one counseling to veterans and military spouses to help them with poverty employment. Casey works to increase the number of couples who can build their careers. He also works in a role with Recruiting Our Heroes to help those transitioning from active duty to civilian life.
Overall, Casey’s experience has served as a beacon of hope and inspiration to others who previously felt unsure about building their careers and lives outside of their roles as parents and military spouses. It wasn’t his original intention, but he’s proud that things turned out that way.
“I can’t tell you how many times over the years I’ve had military spouses come up to me and say, ‘Thank you for letting me.’ And I said: “I don’t need you
permission You should do what is important for you and your family.” Everything else will fall into place after that.”
FROM MOVING THE FAMILY TO THE MOUNTAINS
The stress that comes with being a military spouse and maintaining a career can sometimes feel like the weight of a mountain, constantly moving, introducing yourself to new communities, helping children adjust to new schools, and doing all the things that a service spouse can’t handle. The feeling of conquering those symbolic mountains is probably why Casey is now climbing literal mountains. Casey’s two grandchildren told him they wanted to climb Machu Picchu with him and his grandfather as a graduation present. Thus, eight family members traveled to the mountain for three days.
“Machu Picchu was really tough,” she recalled. “We climbed to 13,500 (feet) in three days and camped on the ground for two nights in 30-degree weather, which wasn’t much fun.”
The whole family is set to go on another climbing adventure later this year, this time to Mount Fuji. Casey did not know how the choice was made, but he confirmed that he did not intend to make climbing a full-time hobby.
“I tell you, I told my husband that this is the last mountain I’m going to conquer.”
INVITATION TO MILITARY FAMILIES
Casey sympathizes with spouses, parents, and other family members who send loved ones to various dangerous situations around the world. However, she also talks about the importance of self-care and being healthy so that they can be the best possible support system for those loved ones and enjoy life with them again when they return home. Her earlier commitment to a healthy lifestyle is what she credits for her health and well-being today.
“I don’t have cholesterol problems, blood pressure, I don’t have any of that, and so I want to do something to stay that way.”
That’s why, despite the potentially mile-long to-do list and the guilt you feel for thinking about yourself, finding ways to stay active even for 30 minutes a day so you can provide that support is a must for military spouses. Casey asserts that it’s not actually selfish; it’s another tool that can help you take the selfless actions you need for your family.
“The truth of the matter is, as caregivers, we put ourselves in the back seat a lot of the time. So I think it takes a concerted effort, and you really have to think about it and push yourself to do it.”
M&F Military Editor Rob Wilkins contributed to this Fit to Service article.
