Do you have a strong sexual desire for people you do not know, but the sooner one romantic relationship is established, do you lose your sexual desire for that person?
If you notice that this is your pattern, you may believe that something is wrong with you. You’ve probably heard of “prevention.” attachment style” and wondered if that was your problem.
There is probably nothing wrong with you. You can be a freesexual.
Man sexuality is often discussed as a stable linear and predictable trajectory: People meet, attraction increases, emotional intimacy deepens and sexual desire becomes stronger. The narrative of the dominant society tells us that the only “normal” is when two people are in a long-term monogamous relationship where sex thrives, and that’s what we should strive for. But human sexuality does not always follow this narrative, as there is more diversity than that.
Freisexualism a sexual orientation which describes a person who primarily feels sexual desire towards people they don’t know well. As emotional intimacy increases, their sexual desire decreases or disappears altogether. This orientation is often the opposite demisexualityin which sexual desire arises only after establishing emotional intimacy. Both freesexuality and demisexuality are part of the broader spectrum of asexuality.
Freisexuality is not discussed much, so many people are not aware of it. But when fraesexuals learn that there is a term for their orientation, it can be validating and transformative for their experience, because they finally don’t feel “broken” anymore.
Freisexualism is not a fear of obligation, to receive bored in relationships – or preference for sex. This is an example of sexual desire that constitutes a legitimate sexual orientation. People may identify with a different sexual orientation; some people are heterosexual and straight, or gay and straight.
A freesexual person tends to feel intense sexual desire in the early stages of dating someone. The thrill of novelty, mystery, or the unknown are some of the important ingredients that drive sexual desire. However, as emotional intimacy develops, the desire for sex diminishes, although affection and romantic feelings for the person remain intact. It is important not to confuse lack of sexual desire with diminished love. In our society, the dominant narrative also tells us that emotional intimacy and sexual desire are inherently linked, but this is not the case for everyone. Freisexual people don’t follow this dominant script, and as a result, they can feel shameconfusion, self-doubt, and even feeling “broken.” It is also common for fraesexuals to be unnecessarily pathologically diagnosed with an attachment disorder or intimacy disorder in a mental health setting if the clinician is not aware of fraesexuality.
Of course, in any long-term relationship, the desire for sexuality diminishes over time; This is not a sign of freesexuality. Some people have attachment and intimacy issues and feel uncomfortable with sex or intimacy with their partners. Issues of attachment and intimacy can always be explored in it therapybut not as a “cure” for freesexuality.
Like other sexual orientations, fraesexuality exists on a spectrum, and experiences vary widely among individuals. Some asexual people lose their sex drive quickly, while others experience a gradual change over time.
A common myth is that asexual people are incapable of love or commitment. In fact, many have long-term stable romantic relationship(s) with meaningful relationships, but these relationships may involve sex. And while “asexual” relationships are perceived negatively in society, they can be suitable for freesexual people. However, it is also common for freesexuals and their romantic partners to be in open relationships that allow them to live their lives authentically and according to their direction.
In a relationship, honesty and clear communication skills are important, as explaining freesexuality to a partner can be difficult. Often people perceive their partner’s sexual desire to decline as a rejection. But in reality, a decline in sexual desire does not automatically equate to a lack of depth, meaning, or meaning in a romantic relationship. It is important that people find a mutual understanding of how they want their relationships to work, rather than being forced to conform to society’s expectations.
Labels aren’t helpful for everyone, but they can provide clarity and relief for people struggling to understand themselves and their sexuality. Discovering the label of freesexuality can help individuals realize that they are not alone and not “broken.” Such a label can shape the language in which more public discourse takes place, making queersexuality more visible and normalizing it as part of the natural diversity of human sexuality.
Sexual orientation Important reading
Human connection and sexual desire are more complex than simplistic models of society often promote. Understanding that complexity can lead to a greater acceptance of human diversity and lead us to be kinder to each other’s differences.
