I decided not to make any new year’s resolutions. This is just not the year for it. There are many suggestions for constructive ways to approach this coming year. There are traditional self-help solutions. Then there is the gentler advice that focuses on gratitude and compassion. But I ignore them all. They mean well. They’re meant to inspire me and motivate me to improve my life, but that’s not what I need right now. I need a break!
I need to give my brain a break. Traditionally, the “brain,” which controls problem solving, organization, emotional regulation, critical thinking, and decision-making, plays a dominant role in our lives. This is the part of the brain that seems to be more logical than emotional. The thinking brain takes in a situation or information and uses its executive skills to produce a well-thought-out response or action.
However, in times of crisis, chaos, or trauma, (anyone follow the news these days?) the survival brain instinctively responds to flight, fight, or freeze. It’s like the thinking brain doesn’t have enough time to process information and come up with a response, so the brain shuts down those tasks and the survival brain kicks in, reacting quickly and instinctively to preserve itself.
Most of us struggle with some of the effects this can have on a person. We may have “foggy brain” and not focus – we may find it harder to complete an activity. There may be changes in our memory – we find it harder to remember things that happened during the day. We can suffer from fatigue both in mind and body. We may feel more emotional than usual. We may neglect basic needs like brushing our teeth, exercising, or cleaning our house. We may act more recklessly – spending too much, eating more, engaging in activities that are not healthy for us.
Our brains need a break from working overtime to process all the different information we’ve been exposed to in recent years. And our survival brain needs a break from being in flight, fight, or freeze mode in response to fear and anxiety caused by the state of the world around us.
Reflect
So I spend the time I would normally spend reflecting on the past year and planning for the new year, and instead I think about nothing at all. I don’t use my mind to plan or consider anything. I don’t try to think of what I’m grateful for. I don’t try to meditate or breathe or be kind to myself. I’m not going try to do something
My goal is to turn off the brain. I enjoy my body and move it in ways that feel good to me. I enjoy friendship, reaching out to friends and sharing a laugh or even a cry. I sleep well, I eat well, I wear new clothes in the morning. I discover simple things that make me happy and I do them.
Instead of creating resolutions that create more expectations and stress for me, I’m taking a break this year. Right now, I don’t need to figure everything out and do everything. For now, just being in your own skin is enough. For now, being close to who I can be is enough. For now, it is enough to find pleasure wherever it may arise. As Mary Poppins said when quoting Sir Thomas Malory, “Enough for a feast.” And I will enjoy it.
This post was originally published on January 12, 2022 and has been updated to reflect new insights.
